Six

I've spent the last couple of days at home by myself. It's been nice. I've had plenty of time to think of everything that has been on my mind. Before all of my thoughts and emotions had been mixed and confused. They still are, but not nearly as much. I have realized a lot. I think I've finally moved on. It's not something I want to do but I think I have to. I can't expect myself to be able to change everything around me. It's just not at all possible and I think I'm okay with that. I'm gonna miss it. The way things used to be. Even how they are now. I'll miss it all. The future holds a lot. I know for a fact that I'll struggle with all of the changes, but it'll be alright. I'll be surrounded by people I love. It'll be tough but I'm excited to face everything that comes my way.

Five

I'm going to Washington State University Vancouver. It's official. Not my first choice but it's all good. I'm sure it will be an easier transition for me. Plus I'll be able to visit my friends in Seattle. And my family there and my grandma will be pleased I'm sure. Go Cougars!

So Roxanne's mom, Bart, and my mom are all on the mainland for a week. It's pretty sweet. We're getting a taste of life without parentals. It's super epic. This weekend is gonna rock =]

Four

You know those tv shows where something that happened in the previous episode doesn't affect anything in the next episode? I wish my life was like that right now. I wish we could all wake up the next day and leave the the past behind us.

Three

Right now I'm bored in AP Biology. We have a sub for the next three weeks and during Mr. Burns' absence we're supposed to be "preparing ourselves for the AP exam". As I look around I see people playing cards, working on senior project powerpoints, surfing the web, playing with photoshop, and reading. Hah. I love this class. Although this class has been really cruise, I've learned a lot even though my test scores may not show it. We've done some totally awesome labs. In the beginning of the year we made this clear solution turn pink and then back to clear. I thought it was the coolest thing ever. It kept me amused for quite some time. For another lab we had to go out and find plants to look at under microscopes. While we searched for plants I got to play with the deer down in the agriculture department. I've been at this school for almost four years and this area was so new to me. I was surprised at how much there was that I haven't explored. It was amazing. I've had some good times in this class. I'm really going to miss everyone in it next year.

For some strange reason I've been in a terrific mood lately. Nothing great has happened recently but everything seems really easy going and fun. It's odd that I can feel like this. Very often a thought will pop into my head and remind me of something that I wish wasn't happening. I then feel completely shitty and I tell myself there's nothing I can do to make things better. It's been really hard for me having two of my very good friends in such an estrangement. A great person once said, "Shit happens. You just gotta learn to deal with it." I'm having a very hard time dealing with it. I totally broke down yesterday. Thankfully Roxanne was there to comfort me. I just couldn't take it anymore. It's not right. I'm so used to seeing them together, happy and enjoying one another's company. It hurts me so much to see two people I deeply care about, who were once so close, suddenly loose touch. Lately things have just seemed to be getting worse and worse. All I can do is look on the bright side and hope things work out. I really hope they do.

Two

Every time I hear a song of theirs I get butterflies in my stomach. I become enthralled in a new joy that immediately makes all my feelings of hate, sadness, and loss disappear. Whether it’s an old song of theirs or a new one, it still has the same affect on me. I’ve grown up with them and it’s so incredible to know that they are still singing and playing loud and strong. To actually see them performing in front of me was one of the most amazing feelings ever. It was astonishingly unreal. Their music has so much power and meaning. I wish that everyone could feel the way I feel about something in their life like I feel for U2.

Today is the release of their 12th album No Line On The Horizon.

It’s magnificent.